Sunday, October 15, 2006

Ask Me Again, If I Like Shootouts? / Habs and Sens Tonight

Okay, the Sens did to the Habs tonight what the Habs did to Leafs last Saturday!

Point blank, I hate the fuckin' shootout.

It solves a hockey game like a whore cures a hardon! It's cheap, sleazy, and a giving in to easy thrills.While I may have pumped to that outcome in younger days, it hardly settles the score while giving two points to the better team. I realize being a fan of tie games leaves me in a minority. Mistake me not, I was never a fan of ties either, I just found it a better reconsilliation of a sporting result than an individualistic competition.

Would you settle the Super Bowl with field goals?

How about the World Series with a home run competition?

The masters with a round of mini putt, anyone?

Then tell me, die hard hockey purist, why does this fly?

This is the Miss America of hockey thinking. No brains - don't matter! Nice tits - you win!

Just like you, I get sucked into the excitement and endorfins of the moment! Like my analogy to tits - it's alluring! Gimme my pussy and beer and to hell with the ugly morning! The whole deal is pandering to the lowest commom denominator in all our senses and priorities.

Wipe that grin and whatever else off your face!

I have made my ideals on how to solve deadlocks very clear in the past. More conclusive ways of ending a game are within reach of the NHL. You like the 4 on 4 overtime? Play until a winner is decided. Hate back to back games where your favorite teams drags their asses icing the puck the entire third period to preserve a win? Abolish them completely and enable playoff style OT in the regular season. It beats the far fetched 3 point game scenario proposed by some hockey thinkers.

At worst, propose a ten minute OT, 4 on 4 style, and then live with the tie.

Last year, both the New York Rangers and Dallas Stars had inflated regular season point totals due to shoot out wins. They inevitebly collapsed, as they should have, in the playoffs first round. Do we want to repeat the scenario year in and out. It falsifies a teams standing, big time. It may even render an unworthy team playoff bound. Maybe your team - this season.

Imagine the shootout goes ten rounds deep on the seaons 82nd game, and Wade Belak or some non playoff team's 7th defenseman knocks your team from the post season. It's bound to happen!

Right now, we are paying the slut whore, to buddy up to our love ones and tell all! Enjoying the shootout is akin to letting your load fly on your cheap pickups face, only to land as a J-peg in your wife's e-mail on payday! Can I the make the danger more clear!
It sucks and swallows bukkake style!

Okay, I'll lighten up now!

As for the Habs loss to Ottawa tonight by shootout, I am within my usual 24 hours analysis period, where I get to watch the game over on video, with a pause button as my best friend.

Home openers are bastards to analize. Tonight, without benefit of a second viewing, I found neither team worthy over the other, of victory either way. Ottawa tightened up their play on a night where the Habs obviously sought to entertain with some fancy play. Samsonov's tying goal will be a highlight reel feature for sure. Coming back for the Habs, twice in the game, merits a good word or two - especially the Habs PK duo of Higgins and Koivu stripping the usually defensively incompetant Spezza at his own blue line for their first goal. Ray Emery looked like a #1 goalie to me, while Cristobal Huet, solid most of the night, was weak on the Sens second tally.

A funny scrum broke out between the Habs Aaron Downy and the Sens Chris Neil at the end of the first. It was long, slow, and the refs let both endure a handful of cranium bruising knucklers before the participants tired each other out.

Radek Bonk is a helluva penalty killer. If he scored 10 this year, he's almost worth his millions!

An even game in many regards despite the shootout declaring a winner!

Seven more matchups between these two? Bring 'em on. We'll win five of 'em!


Mrs. Joseph said...

I came upon your blog during my random sojourn through the "next blog" button and wanted to let you know that I visited. I can't really comment intelligently because I am not a sports fan at all -- I just wanted to let you know that I was here.

reality check said...

Next time be naked! We can talk!

ninja said...

RC, given your name I'd would've thought you realized the shoot-out isn't going anywhere. I prefer regular season ties myself, but that ship sailed along time ago, and abandoning the shoot-out and all its boner inducing excitement ain't gonna least not while Bettman is around.

I've resigned myself to this reality, and that is why I endorse the point system change. Give the league office their fabricated excitement. But give the true fans a more accurate measuring stick.

Zanstorm said...

"both the New York Rangers and Dallas Stars had inflated regular season point totals due to shoot out wins. They inevitebly collapsed, as they should have, in the playoffs first round"

I like this point, but maybe don't quite agree, even tho it is alluring. The Rangers had no heart and the Stars didn't have good goaltending in the playoffs last year.
Generally I wanted the shootout, and still do.
But time constraints will avoid a 10-minute 4 on 4. How about 3 on 3? That would solve it alot sooner by opening up the ice a lot. 1 defenceman and 2 forwards on each side. It's tricky, but still better than a shootout victory.
I fucking hate ties. I really do! There was just too many of them before.

reality check said...

Oh Ninja, I know it ain't going anywhere yet but I don't have to like it. No one can tie in (pardon the pun) any type of attendance resurgance to the shootouts. The prime benefits are to the advertisers and concession stands.

I have accepted it, in a sense - and I have accepted not to like it, even when my team wins.

I believe it's future is not necessarily carved in stone. The 10 minute 4 on 4 would take just as long.

Zan, you could also have mentioned that NYR lost Jagr to injury and that Turco's save % wasn't all that. He may just be a better shootout goalie - witness that sace from Sunday night on Shannon in the Anaheim game.

Anonymous said...

Shootouts are so gay the WHA abandoned them the first week of the first season. On the other hand, we can't have playoff-style OT because those 9-hour games get to be a bit much. Three points for a regulation win, two for an OT win, one for an shootout win, and no points for any tie or loss under any circumstances. That should be enough motivation to play for a win during "real" hockey.