Top 10 Reasons For Sidney Crosby's Slump

From a panel of hockey insiders, gossip mongerers, the sources of rumour mills and whispers around the league, and a guy at Subway who looked suspiciously like Bruce Garrioch, here are the top 10 reasons why Sid the Kid is mired in a deep slump of late.

10 - Pictured himself in a Kansas City Scouts jersey, Reebok styled, and has gone into a deep depression.

9 - Afraid to reveal he is actually the father of Anna Nicole Smith's baby.

8 - Mario Lemieux' s son embarrassed him in a driveway game of 1 on 1 ball hockey.

7 - Still paying off the tab from Ovechkin's "Road Trip" room service stunt.

6 - George Laraque has gotten him fixated on the last Ludacris CD.

5 - In a reaction to the Jason Blake spear, made a trip to local video store to rent "Gladiator". Dimwit store clerk accidentaly rented out "Glad He Ate Her" porno. Puberty has kicked in big time as a result.

4 - Guilt trip. Recently lent unused razor to Britney Spears.

3 - Loss of ice time to Gary Roberts.

2 - Actually believes that "Eyes On The Prize" postings titled "Sidney Crosby, Countdown to 2012" are destiny.

1 - Role model Aaron Downey has been demoted to the minors.

How About A Nice Tall Glass Of ....Shut To Hell Up!

Maybe the saying should be a foot in the mouth is worth two in the behind!

The repercussions of opening that big yap without thinking ahead could have been the theme of the NHL in the past week. Players, player agents, a former player, and the league itself all need to take a hard look at how their words make them appear in the eyes of the general hockey fan public.

Mark Messier, had more than a few heads shaking recently when out of nowhere he proclaimed he wanted to be the next GM of the New York Rangers. Messier, who arrogance has been known to have turned off more than a few, spouted this left field declaration before discussing anything with any of the involved parties in the Rangers organization, namely current Rangers GM Glen Sather.

One can only imagine Sather's reaction upon reading the headline.

I had a problem with the sheer cockiness of the statement. No matter whether Messier percieves himself as the "greatest leader the game has known", this is simply not how one goes about things. Notice how the word "class" is rarely attached to the Moose's resume of achievements.

I took all of a day's time for a response from Sather, who reacted as if blinsided by the declaration. Sather stated in no uncertain terms that he saw no timetable for the ending of his GM duties and that Messier would be well advised to discuss these matters in private in the future.

I take that as a "No"!

Sather gets my vote for the next Mark Messier Leadership Award!

Likely the most hilarious exchange in the league this season comes from the wisdom of Aaron Downey.

Downey, who is a press box regular in the Montreal Canadiens scheme of things, took it upon himself to lecture and admonish the game's biggest star in Sidney Crosby. Despite the mismatch talent wise, Downey pulled no punches in telling Crosby that his act of dropping to ice regularly upon being given the slightest of shoves or knicks was quite unbecoming of his superstar status.

Crosby responded in mock desbelief, stating defiantly "It's funny how you get a high stick and you're not supposed to go down any more."

My question is, when were you supposed to?

Had the words come from an icon the likes of Steve Yzerman or Joe Sakic, everyone would shout "About time!" Being that it came from Downey made it ridiculously strange and surreal for the kid, but it is no less truthful. Let it be useful to him!

Sergei Samsonov and his agent Neil Abbott make a fitting pair. Seems that whenever the player stops talking on the ice and is rightly punished, the agent starts talking. It's a ventriloquist act of sorts. Perhaps it has never crossed Samsonov's ( or his agent's )mind that he ought to try working harder. Instead of waiting for a puck to magically appear on his stick, do something like going and battling for it might help his cause.

For the second time this season, Samsonov has been given a press box seat, and his agent has shot back both times with trade demands. Has either not considered that if there was any inking of the slightest demand for Samsonov's services at his lofty pricetag, he would have been gone by now.

Habs GM Bob Gainey was left (read cornered) with no choice but to waive the unproductive winger.

No teams took the bait!

It must have been a complete surprise to Samsonov that he can't even be given away. Now he will be pulling on a Hamilton Bulldogs jersey, more than likely, while the Habs await a sucker willing to gamble on him.

I doubt that proving his worth at the AHL level will do Samsonov any favors. Should he be recalled to the NHL, teams can snap him up at discount dollars. He would still be overpriced. Adding to the risk of claiming Samsonov for any team, is the fact that his baggage now includes an agent who believes his underachieving client is easily wronged.

The only smart thing said by the duo in this mess was Samsonov alluding to coach Carbonneau seeing him as part of the problem.

You got that right, Sergei, and now you can wonder why!

Did Brendan Shanahan expect an overnight about face from NHL officials in regards to non-calls to infractions supposedly committed on team mate Jaromir Jagr?

Since when does complaining aloud work in cases like this? Jagr is well known for whining, rather than sucking it up, and ought to know by now that the NHL hardly revolves around him. So should Shanahan. If anything, a player should make such statements across the board, and give the league a heads up wakeup call that officiating is consistantly inconsistant. The examples are ranpant. Focusing the problem on one particular player achieves nothing but remorse.

Mike Murphy, the NHL's senior VP of hockey operations had this to say:

"I think criticism is a great form of adjustment for us. The more honest criticism directed at us helps us watch our department close to make sure we do things right."

Well isn't that an earth shattering claim. What a load!

Murphy goes on to add that "Criticism isn't something we run from."

Oh yeah! Since when?

Rangers coach Tom Renney, after the Rangers most recent loss, had this to add:

"I'm not suggesting they didn't miss a few on us, too. It was one of those games where it would have been nice if we could have decided the outcome."

Well isn't that nice.

As usual, the NHL is more than happy to talk about issues, rather than actually do anything about them and confront it head on.

It's the same old, "We know, we know, everything is just fine" stance.

How they can continue to take an ostrich approach to the game's woes and perceptions is awful enlightening.

Countering every "the games never been healthier" claim, are knee buckling admissions that all is a state of flux in the game's best league. News of constant bickering over scheduling proposals, the second look at radical goal nets to increase scoring, and talk of unstable franchises sends a completely different message to fans looking for some form of stability in the game.

Each time anyone opens their mouth to complain about the game, it shoots itself in the foot. With the foot in the mouth, such actions are suicidal.

Having owners name the other franchises that weren't in favor in balanced schedules was ill-advised and reckless. Releasing the findings of an NHL fan poll stating they found things to be best just the way they are, was almost slapstick in it's timing and damage control execution. The league needs a Commissioner who can control and enforce its owners and its people in charge.

The perception of the league takes a hit each time negative press reaches the ears of fans. While they cannot control what media outlets write, they absolutely can limit the type of information they wish to have known from it's member clubs and league personel.

Canadiens And Penguins - A Rivalry In The Making?

Some termed it passionate hockey at it's best. Anyone watching the Habs and Pittsburgh over the last two meetings would be hard pressed to disagree. The atmosphere was pure playoff hockey in Febuary.

These games had it all. Comebacks, controversy, great plays, great goaltending, and Sidney Crosby at his best and worst.

Add in that the duo of former Habs GM and coach, Andre Savard and Michel Therrien man the Pens bench, and it doesn't take a crystal ball to see where all this steam could erupt if a playoff matchup were in the cards.
In just the space of a little more than 120 minutes of hockey, there have been enough highlights of the controversial variety to fill several separate columns and stand alone pieces.

From the drop of the puck Thursday night, there was the Crosby - Maxim Lapierre "Was it is really a butt end?" incident. Lapierre, it has been noted, has long been a thorn in Crosby's side. Two seasons back, in the QMJHL, Lapierre was employed to shadow and irritate Sid the Kid, and came out on the good end of a hat trick. There's a history between the two that appears far from over.

Off the faceoff, Lapierre shoved Crosby to ice after losing the draw. Crosby's much talked about "excellent, low center of gravity" didn't help much as Lapierre caught him off balance. Crosby attempted to make it look as though he'd been butted, but a second camera angle defied his claim. A player spiked in such a manner would bend forward initially and not fall backwards. Hockey's new Lawrence Olivier, was not born yesterday when it comes to drawing penalties.

The act is beginning to wear thin. In an incident from Saturday's game, Crosby was accidently high sticked by the shaft of Francis Bouillon's graphite forward hacker, and he dropped like Wyle E. Coyote's anvil. While a call would have been totally legitimate here, Crosby's antics are fostering doubt among the black and white stripe set. It seems that when Sid adds the ketchup and mustard to the hotdog, the refs are less and less inclined to point skyward.

Crosby nets many comparisons to Lemieux for his on ice skill and ability, but this is more in the vein of Claude Lemieux, the former Hab and Devil most often associated with faking injuries. Lemieux, Claude, employed this schtick beyond exhaustion and effectiveness, leading to Pat Burns, his former coach, pre-empting the teams very trainers from participating in the folly.

Crosby actually got trash talked down on the subject by one-goal man, Aaron Downey. Yapping from the benches ends, the two exchanged grocery shopping secrets, according to Downey, who admitted that his rant pointed to Crosby's premier player status, and how such behavior chipped away at such esteem. I'll never likely get to suggest this ever again, but may Sidney learn this lesson from the mouth of a one goal man, for the best interests of hockey fans everywhere.

According to Downey, the conversation went like this:

"We were having a few words - (Recchi) was telling me his philosophy on life, and I was telling him mine," Downey said, setting off in his unique orbit.

"It seemed to work. I think I had a better world view than he did. He was more materialistic and I had a deeper sense of what was happening. He didn't like that, with his comeback, so I gave it to him a little more and Sidney tried to defend him.

"A lot of words were used, like nullified and patriotism. I ain't gonna lie to you, I had a lot of fun out there. I haven't played in a month, and for the first couple shifts, it was like: 'Holy smoke, this is fast hockey.' "

Sidney, we all want to keep on loving you, so ditch the act. It's unbecoming of you.

Colby Armstrong on the other hand, developed the first case of Habsfearflu. He simply did not show up due to some mysterious injury. How convenient!

As soon as coach Guy Carbonneau suggested that Armstrong would surely be playing with his head up on Sunday, the Penguins forward did what he did in his fight with Souray - he wimped out.

It's likely that coach Therrien smartly removed the element of retribution from the game. He is guiding a young team in full dynasty metamorphosis, and surely doesn't relish the distraction. He's also wise enough to understand about playing into the whole mess in the magnified hockey microscope that is the city of Montreal. Having coached in Montreal, and being the first QMJHL bench boss to take his team to a Memorial Cup in twenty-five years, Therrien is nobody's fool. In his junior apprenticeship, he was in fact viewed as the gooniest of hard-ass coaches, hell bent on winning in the allies as much as on the ice. His silence and "no comment" spoke volumes on the lessons learned.

Crosby, in a sideline story, did leave behind one very classy gesture in Montreal. After having been interviewed between periods on RDS, he realized that there was something important that he wanted to say. He asked team mate Mark Recchi to relay a message on air for him before changing his mind and doing it himself during the second period intermission. Appearing right after the Recchi interview, Crosby popped in to say hello to friends and fans from the Rimouski area. A nice touch.

Much has been written on the Jekyl and Hydeness of the Canadiens of late. Which team shows up is too often being determined by the percieved calibre of the opponants. It has been discussed that lack of emotion has been at the rotting core of some very dismal showings. The heart of the team is questioned at times, leadership as well. The term "stupid penalties" enters the argument at every turn.

All are valid points, but I must open the wound that is penalty calls.

You can term it "taking stupid penalties" in one regard, but too often it is a case dumb calls being made. The Canadiens in this view are absolutely the most fouled against team when it gets down how officials have been calling their games. Look no further than last Thursday's call against Ryder and the Souray fiasco that followed. There is an obvious bias playing out in some games, with certain officials. In Saturday's game, the calls tilted in favor of the Penguins by a huge margin.

I often find that when the Habs are off their mark, these officiating inconsistancies are at the heart of it. They are duped by it into to playing a timid brand of hockey that is not theirs. They look off balance and out of sync, they stop hitting and pursuing the puck with the same grit, and the lines are all skewred for timing and become incompatible.

But lo and behold, the Canadiens are the best third period team in the league. They have registered 18 points ( 7 wins and 4 SO/OT losses ) when trailing after two periods, almost a third of their seasons total so far. What accounts for this abnormality?

Simply, it is the long standing but unwritten league policy of putting the whistles away in the third period.

If I were an NHL GM, I'd hire a full time scout or two, just to get a handle on the calling tendencies of certain officials games. A few days before the team has to deal with the evolving hybrid of make-it-up-as-they-go-alongness, a team meeting could be held to say that so and so has a habit of extremely chintzy calls in the hooking department. Such informational strategies might actually become the norm should officiating continue to be so atroscious.

Habs Over Caps 4-1 / Another Officiating Low

Tonight's Capitals and Canadiens tilt had the cumulative effect of splitting my emotions in different directions. While it may at first glance apprear to be a game in which the Habs coasted to a 4-1 win, it left different impressions with me.

As a consequence of the way the game went, I have little thought cohesiveness to bring to this post so quickly after it has ended.

For a quick random game summary: Huet was his solid usual self. Markov and Bonk did great work neutralizing Ovechkin to the outside lanes. It was funny to watch Downey score. Semin is better than most people think. Latendresse notched two assists playing on the thrid and fourth lines. The Capitals have zero blueline presence on the PP. Washingston doesn't quit - very exciting team to watch. The referees missed the game.

While watching the game I remembered something my father had said years ago while we were taking in a CFL game in front of the Sunday afternoon TV.

During that Alouettes game, a touchdown was called back and my Dad was fuming. I was too young at the time to recall the infraction call being a good one or not. I do remember my father saying bad officiating is what keeps him from watching sports at times.

Today his three VCR's capture all his interests from pucks and balls to Nascar and Formula 1. I imagine he does his share of fast forwarding.

Dad was not just a casual fan, he followed baseball, football, was outright religious about hockey, was a great swimmer in his youth, did some downhill skiing, snowmobiling, and mostly raced motorcycles with the passion of a dedicated madman while winning most of the time.

I never understood then, why it had upset him - especially with hockey. The Canadiens won all the time then. I was in my glory. There wasn't anything to complain about.

Over the last while I've noticed myself emulating his long ago behavior. Lately it's become very apparent to me. Tonight, the Canadiens won, but when the final buzzer sounded, I was incensed. When that occurs, the last grasps at sanity must make oneself wonder why fumes upset what ought to be joyousness.

I do lighten up, easily, but the overiding emotion never strays far.

My father didn't raise me to be a homer type of fan. When we watched games, we watched both teams. When we saw bad calls made, I learned without a blind spot that they occur to both teams.

My barometer to being grounded revolved around the ideals that no player was bigger than any sport, no team more important than the game itself. Fans fit in at the bottom line.

That line is thin at times. It is where my father found himself when he said that comment years ago. It's where I find myself at lately: bemused by where the sport seems headed, put off completely by incompetant officiating.

There was always that human element - referees are people, and human as we all are, we make mistakes.
It's not an unreasonable notion. But sport is a business.

If I made as many mistakes at my job as the officials on ice did tonight, I'd lose my job. If everyone at a plant or office performed as detrimentally as these jokers in zebra suits did tonight, said business would shut down.
Now I care about this game of hockey, more than I care about my Montreal Canadiens team I write of almost daily. I want this game to be at it's most fluid, passionate, poetic best.

All I can see after games like this is a sport business grinding the gears of uncomfortable growth while it fights off indifference from those who walk away from it. Away from arena's. Away from their T.V. sets. Forever turned into empty seats that can't quite speak loud enough for our favorite league to hear.

During tonight's game, both teams got reamed by bad calls, non calls and overzealous calls.

Washington lost the games opening goal to an extremely quick whistle. Huet had never frozen the puck, as it slowly trickled through his pads into the net unrewarded. There was not a Caps player near him to warrant blowing it dead any quicker. From then on, like the knee jerk correction only a ref can make in amends, they spent the remainder of the game, taking their sweet time to blow dead any puck tightly in Huet's firm grasp.

That did well to raise the tensions and general chippyness of the game.

It increased the stick fouls to an unpenalizable level. There was simply too much to call - hardly what last years crackdown on fouls was initiated to achieve. They penalized retaliation while missing everything that lead to them. Apparently, you can dish it out, you just can't give it back.

Players on both teams took turns faking injury and diving and falling at will. The most obvious dives went uncalled. The slightest of stick fouls were seemingly picked out on a whim. The useful double minor call seems extinct.

Alex Kovalev gave Alexander Ovechkin a one handed sword slash to the wrist area. Ovechkin bent for a split second, to favour it, a minute later he led a dazzling up ice rush. Both players should have gotten two.

Aaron Downey's goal should have been disallowed. He knocked a puck down from over his shoulders with a high stick. While it didn't look like it hit the ice, it bounced off Kolzig's pad to be knocked in waist high by Downey a second time. Shouldn't the whistle have blown?

Craig Rivet got into a tustle along the boards with Chris Clark. The Caps captains stick caught Rivet in the forehead - no call. Rivet pursued Clark, likely to pound his lights out. A stick tap here and there from both and their arms met in a shoving match. Rivet relented, looking pissed - Clark was in a full facial shield. Rivet got the two he deserved, Clark went unpunished.

With a 2-0 game still on the line, the Canadiens were given 6 third period penalties, five of which were in the final ten minutes The third call came six seconds after the secord call ended. The final three calls overlapped into two 5 on 3 advantages for the Caps. Washington were handed three calls themselves, one, I forget which, was extremely questionable and killed their powerplay.

In the midst of all this, the Capitals netted one while two men up. The Canadiens, quite proficient on the penalty kill, continued to ice the puck at every opportunity. This was primarily how they had to play the final ten minutes.

A sad spectacle, again!

I wonder how that empty seat feels?